Because I clearly never want to date again...

I really like okcupid.com. If you're looking for a dating website, this may be the one. It's free, but not total crap or filled with totally sketchy people (like plentyoffish.com). It does seem to have an overabundance of polyamorous people. Anyway, as I've mentioned before, it matches you with people in a couple different ways, one of those is the Quiver. They randomly drop three people in your quiver and you get to decide whether you're interested or not. It gives you more information than if they just end up on Quickmatch, which leaves off a substantial portion of the person's profile. Sometimes that's better though, because sometimes you end up with this guy: WearingNight.

If you don't want to follow the link, I'll just give you his first paragraph, and you can see for yourself why sometimes, less is more.

Forged in the smoky underdark of New York City, I entered the world with a endless black wardrobe, an irrevocable fondness for lurking in shadows, and a vague horror of ever eating the same food two days in a row. Having first devoured Shakespeare and Tolkien to learn English, I then set about a misspent youth of mad science, intellectual tomfoolery, journalism, live theater, creative fiction, filmmaking, and coffee shops with strange decor before finding my true calling in machines with blinky lights. Ralph Ellison, Harlan Ellison, Neil Gaiman, and both Voltaires duel nightly upon my bookshelves, their clamour witnessed only by the stiff and disapproving cookbooks and the remorseless, unblinking glass of many cameras.

It doesn't get better the more you read. I'm pretty sure this will keep me from ever being successful with the online dating. I feel this way about having kids too. I've laughed at so many babies for not being cute that I'm sure my babies will be trolls.

Of course, if this is the guy that's online for me, I think I'll pass anyway.